Tuesday, January 18, 2005

my sister the instant message comedian

so my sister kellyn (kel in the messages below) was slaying me via instant message yesterday. she starts out commenting on how she didn't like that "lost" didn't win a golden globe for best tv drama.

[16:47] kel: So that was sucky that lost lost to nip tuck
[16:47] kel: lost lost thats fun to say
[16:48] LtotheJizay33: i'm totally lost on the the idea that lost lost
[16:49] kel: yeah when lost lost i was totally lost
[16:50] LtotheJizay33: it was such a loss when lost lost
[16:50] kel: haha ok and were done

-->hysterical laughter point #1

[16:51] LtotheJizay33: that was pretty much unquestionably the funniest thing you've ever written on im
[16:51] kel: really?
[16:51] LtotheJizay33: yeah, the delivery in my head is perfect
[16:52] kel: haha perfect...glad to make tuesday jan 18 memorable
[16:52] LtotheJizay33: mark it down, y'all
[16:52] kel: did you know that in your lifetime you will eat at least 8 spiders while you are sleeping
[16:52] LtotheJizay33: i actually did
[16:52] kel: that is what my snapple jsut told me...grosse
[16:53] LtotheJizay33: and i think that rumor/fact/myth is total BS
[16:53] LtotheJizay33: but it is fun to say to people that are scared of spiders
[16:53] kel: yeah i dont know how they studied that one to come up with the answer
[16:53] LtotheJizay33: and people that are scared of eating
[16:53] kel: yeah haha
[16:53] kel: but i bet you did not that beavers use to be the size of bears
[16:53] kel: that is crazy to think about
[16:54] kel: can imagine the size of their dams?

-->hysterical laughter point #2

[16:54] LtotheJizay33: either i'm slap happy or you are on a gd roll
[16:54] kel: i think im on a roll..im in a goofy mood today
[16:55] kel: glad to be entertaining you in your last leg of work though
[16:58] LtotheJizay33: seriously, jai and i are rolling
[16:58] kel: really?
[16:58] LtotheJizay33: that is crazy to think about .... that's the funny lead in
[16:58] kel: haha yeah...now im laughing
[16:58] LtotheJizay33: yeah, cuz it sounds like you're getting all into it
[16:58] LtotheJizay33: that is CRAZY to think about!?
[16:59] kel: haha...when i first read that fact i was pretty shocked...and some images of brown bear size beavers building dams the size of houses popped into my head
[17:00] kel: they could serisouly kill someone with their tail

-->honestly, you're laughing right now, right?

[17:00] LtotheJizay33: seriously, we have to take your act on the instant message comedy tour
[17:01] kel: ok...it can jsut all be baout snapple facts...it will be great
[17:01] kel: good stuff
[17:05] kel: F bees...now bear sized beavers thats scary s**t
[17:06] LtotheJizay33: lol
[17:06] LtotheJizay33: slapping with their huge tails
[17:07] kel: haha yep...and holdin you hostage in their mansion sized dams

-->this is probably the joke i'm most proud of ... so clever, ridiculous and hilarious ... the hostage thing implies just a ridiculous level of evilness in these beavers and the fact that she tied it back into the size of the dams ... i mean, gd, i'm shedding a little tear of proudness here ... i'm seriously tickled just thinking about how funny this is ... bear sized beavers that build mansion-sized dams and then go kidnap people and tie them up, that's my kind of comedy there

[17:07] LtotheJizay33: seriously, you need to stop
[17:08] kel: haha
[17:09] kel: buck teeth have a whole different meaning to me now

-->pretty good capper

well done, kellyn. well done. welcome to kinko's.

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